150 Best Virginia Jokes and Puns That’ll Make You Say Oh My Land

Ever heard the one about the Shenandoah River? It’s quite the current affair! Get ready to dive into a collection of hilarious Virginia jokes and puns that will have you rolling on the floor laughing, whether you’re a native Virginian or just passing through.

We’ve scoured the Old Dominion from the Blue Ridge Mountains to the Chesapeake Bay to bring you the best of Virginia humor.

Prepare yourself for some side-splitting wordplay that celebrates everything Virginia, from its rich history to its unique landscapes. Let’s get started!

Best Virginia Jokes and Puns That’ll Make You Say Oh My Land

• Why did the tourist get lost in Virginia? Because they couldn’t decide if they were in the Commonwealth or the Uncommon-wealth!
• I tried to make a reservation at a fancy restaurant in Virginia Beach, but they said they were fully booked. I guess you could say they’re always “shore” of customers.
• Did you hear about the guy who tried to steal corn from a field in Virginia? He was charged with “stalk”ing.
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo in Richmond? Pouch potato.
• Why did the Virginian bring a ladder to the bar? Because they heard the drinks were on the “House of Burgesses.”
• A visitor asked a local, “What’s the state bird of Virginia?” The local replied, “The Cardinal, but sometimes I think it should be the traffic cone.”
• Why did the scarecrow win an award in Virginia? Because he was outstanding in his field, especially near the Shenandoah Valley.
• I went to a seafood restaurant in Virginia, and the waiter told me their crab cakes were the best in the state. I took a bite and said, “Well, they’re definitely not Chesapeake-ing out on flavor!”
• Why was the math book sad in Virginia? Because it had too many problems related to the Appalachian Trail’s elevation changes.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of music? Bluegrass, of course. They like to keep things “Old Dominion” style.
• Two Virginians were arguing about the best place to get barbecue. Finally, one said, “Look, let’s just agree to disagree and settle this with a duel.” The other replied, “A duel? Isn’t that a bit dramatic?” The first one shrugged and said, “Well, Virginia is for lovers… of history.”
• Why did the peanut farmer in Virginia get a ticket? He was going over the “speed limit” on the legume-acy.
• Did you hear about the ghost that haunts Colonial Williamsburg? He’s always complaining about the lack of “spirit” in the modern era.
• What’s a pirate’s favorite part of Virginia? “Arrrr”lington!
• A tourist in Virginia asked a local, “Is it always this humid here?” The local replied, “No, sometimes it’s just sticky with historical significance.”

Virginia Jokes: Old Dominion, New Laughs

“Virginia Jokes: Old Dominion, New Laughs” dives deep into the state’s unique quirks, from historical figures to modern-day absurdities. It’s more than just corny puns; it’s a celebration of Virginia’s character, serving up witty observations and regional humor that’ll have you chuckling whether you’re a lifelong Virginian or just visiting….

• Why did the Virginia historian bring a ladder to the library?: He heard the books were on a higher shelf, and he wanted to reach new heights of knowledge.
• What do you call a Virginia ghost that loves to shop? A spirit of retail therapy, always haunting the boutiques in Richmond.
• Why was the Virginia math book always so sad?: It had too many problems, and none of them involved a good view of the Blue Ridge Mountains.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia Beach boardwalk, but it was too *shore* to get a good reaction.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of weather forecast?: Anything that predicts a sunny day with a gentle breeze, perfect for a stroll through a historic plantation.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job as a tour guide?: It was great at showing people around, and always on time, and a real sense of the Old Dominion state.
• A Virginia tourist asked, “Is it always this humid?” The local replied, “Only when it’s not raining, and sometimes when it is.”
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for historical artifacts?: A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing treasures in the Old Dominion soil.
• I tried to write a song about the Shenandoah Valley, but it was a bit too *mountain-ous* for my taste, a real challenge to reach the high notes.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a life coach?: It had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of sandwich?: Anything with a good country ham, a real taste of the Old Dominion.
• Why did the Virginia squirrel get a new job as a librarian?: It heard they had a great collection of books about nuts, and a real way of preserving the best stories in the state.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities.
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo in Charlottesville? A pouch potato, just taking it easy near the University.
• Why did the Virginian bring a map to Williamsburg?: He heard the history was a bit of a maze, and he didn’t want to get lost in the past.

Virginia Puns That Are Cavalierly Clever

Virginia’s humor scene? It’s a riot! But watch out for those “Virginia Puns That Are Cavalierly Clever.” They’re not just jokes, they’re witty wordplay with a Southern drawl. We’re talking puns so smooth, they’ll make you say, “Oh, you sly dog!” From Richmond to Roanoke, these puns are a local…

• Why did the Virginia history professor bring a ladder to the lecture?: He heard the topic was going to be on a higher level, a real climb of knowledge from the Old Dominion.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for buried treasure?: A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities, stuck in a state of highway gridlock.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of movie?: Anything with a good *colonial* plot, and a lot of historic drama.
• A Virginia ghost was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a real spectral struggle with the strings, a hauntingly difficult instrument, and a bit of a ghostly chord challenge.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a life coach?: It had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog of life, and a real sense of direction.
• I tried to write a song about the Virginia landscape, but it was a bit too *mountain-ous* for my style, a real climb of a challenge to reach the high notes of inspiration.
• What do you call a Virginia musician who’s always on the road?: A real touring twang-a-thon, always picking up new fans and hitting all the right notes across the Old Dominion.
• Why did the Virginia map get a new job as a motivational speaker?: It had a lot of winding insights to share, and a real way of getting people to explore new routes and find their own path, naturally.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coastline, but it was a little too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities and a bit too much coastal material for my style.
• What’s a Virginia mathematician’s favorite type of equation?: Anything with a good *Old Dominion* constant, and a lot of historical logic, and a true love of numbers.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance, he said it was all about finding the right *step* in the soil and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia State Fair, but it was too *corny* to land, a real earful of clichés and a lot of homegrown fun.
• What do you call a Virginia bird that’s a great comedian?: A real tweet-talker, always ready to make you laugh with a lot of Old Dominion charm.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society?: It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and maybe get a little more well-read, and a better sense of the past, naturally, and a real sense of the Old Dominion.

Virginia Jokes: From the Mountains to the Shore

“Virginia Jokes: From the Mountains to the Shore” captures the humor unique to the state, from Appalachian wit to coastal quips. This collection, within the broader “Virginia Jokes and Puns,” offers a lighthearted journey through the Commonwealth. Expect plenty of playful jabs at local quirks and a delightful blend of…

• A Virginia historian was trying to explain the past: it was a real *Jamestown* of events, and a lot of colonial intrigue.
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo in Arlington?: A pouch potato, just hanging out near the Pentagon, a real slow-mover.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia wine country, but it was too *grape* to get a clear punchline.
• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a bit of a *nut-orious* challenge with all the strings.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a life coach?: It had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog.
• A Virginia peanut was feeling overwhelmed: it said it had too much on its shell-plate, and a real nut-case of a day.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of historical document?: Anything with a good “Old Dominion” tale, and a lot of lore from the early settlers.
• I tried to write a song about the Virginia mountains, but it was a bit too *Shenandoah* to get a clear tune, a real climb of a challenge.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to juggle, but it was a bit of a *plant*-astic challenge.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society?: It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and maybe get a little more well-read, and a better sense of the past, and a real sense of the Old Dominion.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for buried treasure? A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger.
• A Virginia tourist asked, “Is it always this humid here?” The local replied, “Only when it’s not raining, and sometimes when it is, it’s a real sticky situation.”
• Why did the Virginia map get a new job as a motivational speaker: It had a lot of winding insights to share, and a real way of getting people to explore new routes.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coastline, but it was too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of music?: Bluegrass, of course, it’s a real down-home sound with a lot of Old Dominion soul.

Historical Hilarity: Virginia Jokes Through the Ages

Dive into “Historical Hilarity,” a treasure trove within “Virginia Jokes and Puns”! Unearth rib-tickling humor from Virginia’s past, from colonial quips to Civil War wisecracks. Discover how Virginians have used laughter to navigate life’s ups and downs, all while exploring the state’s rich history. Get ready for a chuckle-filled journey…

• Why did the Virginia revolutionary refuse to use a map? He preferred to chart his own course, naturally.
• I tried to make a joke about Virginia’s tobacco industry, but it was a little too *leaf* me alone for my taste.
• What do you call a Virginia ghost that loves to tell stories? A spectral storyteller with a lot of haunting tales.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a librarian? It wanted to illuminate the great stories of the past, and be a real beacon of knowledge.
• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the mandolin, but it was a bit of a *nutty* situation with all the strings.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia mountains, but it was a bit too *Shenandoah* to get a clear tune, a real climb of a challenge.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for historical artifacts? A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society? It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and a real sense of the Old Dominion.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of historical document? Anything with a good colonial story, and a lot of lore from the early settlers.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance, he said it was all about finding the right step in the soil and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm, naturally.
• Why did the Virginia peanut get a new job at the library? It wanted to be surrounded by great books, and maybe get a little more cultured.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coastline, but it was a little too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities.
• What do you call a Virginia musician who’s always on the road? A real touring twang-a-thon, always picking up new fans and hitting all the right notes across the Old Dominion.
• A Virginia historian was trying to explain the past, it was a real *Jamestown* of events, with a lot of colonial intrigue, and a few key twists.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of movie? Anything with a good *colonial* plot, and a lot of historic drama, naturally.

Virginia Puns: A Lover’s Guide to Laughter

Looking for laughs that are as charming as the Blue Ridge Mountains? “Virginia Puns: A Lover’s Guide to Laughter” is your go-to guide! This book, part of the “Virginia Jokes and Puns” collection, is packed with witty wordplay celebrating everything from the state’s history to its natural beauty. Get ready…

• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a bit of a *nut-orious* challenge with all the strings, and a real woodland struggle to find the right notes.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a life coach: It had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog of life, naturally from the coast.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance: he said it was all about finding the right *step* in the soil, and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm, and a whole lot of sunshine.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities, stuck in a state of highway gridlock.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of music: Bluegrass, of course, they like to keep things “Old Dominion” style, and a real down-home sound with a lot of mountain harmonies.
• A Virginia ghost was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a real spectral struggle with the strings, a hauntingly difficult instrument, and a bit of a ghostly chord challenge.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society: It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and maybe get a little more well-read, and a better sense of the past, and a real sense of the Old Dominion.
• Why did the Virginia map get a new job as a motivational speaker: It had a lot of winding insights to share, and a real way of getting people to explore new routes and find their own path, naturally with a love for the state.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coastline, but it was a little too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities and a bit too much coastal material for my style.
• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the mandolin, but it was a bit of a *nutty* situation with all the strings, and a real woodland challenge.
• I tried to write a song about the Virginia mountains, but it was a bit too *Shenandoah* to get a clear tune, a real climb of a challenge to reach the high notes of inspiration.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to juggle, but it was a bit of a *plant*-astic challenge, and a real green-thumb of a struggle to get the plants to cooperate.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of movie?: Anything with a good *colonial* plot, and a lot of historic drama, naturally, with a lot of tales from the past and a real sense of the Old Dominion.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for buried treasure?: A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger, naturally, from the Old Dominion.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance, he said it was all about finding the right *step* in the soil, and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm, and a whole lot of sunshine, naturally from the heartland.

Virginia Jokes for Every Region: A Statewide Chuckle Tour

Ready for a laugh that spans the Old Dominion? “Virginia Jokes for Every Region” is your ticket to a statewide chuckle tour! This collection dives deep into local humor, from the mountains to the coast. Expect playful jabs at everything Virginian, with puns so corny they’ll make you blush (with…

• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a historian: It wanted to illuminate the past and be a beacon of knowledge for the Old Dominion.
• A Williamsburg ghost was trying to learn how to play the fife, but it was a real spectral struggle with the notes.
• What do you call a Virginia squirrel that’s a skilled detective: A real nut-case solver, always finding the clues in the Old Dominion.
• A Richmond street performer was trying to learn how to juggle, but he kept dropping the historical artifacts, it was a real past-time of a performance.
• Why did the Virginia gardener get a new job as a motivational speaker: He had a lot of down-to-earth insights to share, and a real way of helping people grow.
• I tried to make a joke about the Shenandoah Valley, but it was too *mountainous* to get a clear punchline, and a real climb of a challenge to reach the high notes of humor.
• What’s a Virginia bird’s favorite type of music: Anything with a good bluegrass beat, and a lot of down-home harmonies.
• A Norfolk sailor was trying to learn how to knit, but it was a bit of a knotty situation with all the yarn.
• Why did the Virginia sweet potato get a new job at the library: It wanted to be surrounded by great books, and maybe get a little more cultured, and a real need to branch out.
• A Charlottesville historian was trying to explain the past: It was a real *Jeffersonian* of events with a lot of twists and turns.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for buried treasure?: A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger.
• I tried to write a song about the Virginia coastline, but it was a bit too *shore* to get a good melody, a real wave of missed opportunities.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society: It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and maybe get a little more well-read, and a better sense of the past.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities, naturally.
• A Virginia firefly was feeling dramatic: it said it was having a real glow-up of emotions and a lot of Southern charm.

Virginia Puns So Bad, They’re Monumental

Prepare yourself for puns so corny, they’re practically historical! Virginia’s joke scene boasts wordplay so bad, it’s reached monumental status. We’re talking puns about “Richmond” your heart and “Arlington” to be taken seriously, delivered with a charming, Southern drawl. Get ready for a laugh, or at least a groan, because…

• A Virginia history teacher was trying to explain the past, it was a real *colonial* of events, and a bit of a Williamsburg tale.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job as a motivational speaker: It had a lot of time-tested insights to share, and a real knack for always being on time, and a real sense of the Old Dominion.
• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a bit of a *nutty* situation with all the strings, and a real woodland challenge.
• I tried to make a joke about Virginia’s peanuts, but it was too *shell*-shocking for my taste, a real legume of a challenge.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a life coach: It had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of music: Bluegrass, of course, they like to keep things “Old Dominion” style, and a real down-home sound with a lot of mountain harmonies.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance, he said it was all about finding the right *step* in the soil, and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm.
• A tourist asked, “Is it always this humid in Virginia?” The local replied, “Only when it’s not raining, and sometimes when it is, it’s a real sticky situation, bless your heart.”
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities.
• What do you call a Virginia dog that loves to dig for historical artifacts?: A real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past, and a bit of a colonial digger, naturally.
• Why did the Virginia sweet potato get a new job at the library: It wanted to be surrounded by great books, and maybe get a little more cultured, and a real need to branch out.
• A Virginia ghost was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a real spectral struggle with the strings, a hauntingly difficult instrument, and a bit of a ghostly chord challenge.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coast, but it was too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities.
• Why did the Virginia historian bring a ladder to the library?: He heard the books were on a higher shelf, and he wanted to reach new heights of knowledge.
• A Virginia hot air balloon was feeling overwhelmed: It said it had too many ups and downs and a real altitude adjustment of emotions, and a need to find its own way.

Virginia Jokes: Why They’re the Best in the Commonwealth

Virginia jokes, like our state, are a unique blend of history, charm, and a touch of the absurd. From poking fun at our love for peanuts and presidents to gentle ribbing of our slow-paced living, they’re the best because they’re *ours*. It’s a humor born of shared experiences, making each…

• A Virginia historian was trying to explain the past, he said it was a real *colonial* of events, with a lot of twists and turns, and a touch of that Old Dominion charm.
• A Virginia gardener was trying to learn how to dance, he said it was all about finding the right *step* in the soil, and a little bit of green-thumb rhythm.
• A Virginia squirrel was trying to learn how to play the mandolin, but it was a bit of a *nutty* situation with all the strings.
• A Virginia dog that loves to dig for buried treasure is a real paw-chaeologist, always unearthing secrets of the past.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia traffic, but it was a real road block of humor, and a bit of a jam session of missed opportunities.
• A Virginia ghost was trying to learn how to play the banjo, but it was a real spectral struggle with the strings, a hauntingly difficult instrument.
• A Virginia sweet potato was trying to learn how to knit, but it was a bit of a root-y challenge with all the yarn.
• A Virginia lighthouse got a new job as a life coach, it had a lot of illuminating insights to share, and a real beacon of positivity, especially for those lost in the fog.
• A Virginia history teacher was trying to explain the past, it was a real *Jamestown* of events, with a lot of colonial intrigue, and a few key twists, naturally.
• A Virginia tourist asked, “Is it always this humid here?” The local replied, “Only when it’s not raining, and sometimes when it is, it’s a real sticky situation, bless your heart.”
• I tried to write a song about the Virginia mountains, but it was a bit too *Shenandoah* to get a clear tune, a real climb of a challenge to reach the high notes of inspiration.
• What’s a Virginian’s favorite type of music?: Bluegrass, of course, they like to keep things “Old Dominion” style and a real down-home sound with a lot of mountain harmonies.
• Why did the Virginia clock get a new job at the historical society: It wanted to be surrounded by timeless classics, and maybe get a little more well-read, and a better sense of the past, and a real sense of the Old Dominion, naturally.
• I tried to make a joke about the Virginia coastline, but it was a little too *shore* to get a good reaction, a real wave of missed opportunities, and a bit too much coastal material for my style.
• Why did the Virginia lighthouse get a new job as a historian: It wanted to illuminate the past and be a beacon of knowledge for the Old Dominion, and a real way of guiding people through history.