150 Best Crush Jokes and Puns: The Ultimate List to Make You Blush
Got a secret admirer? Butterflies fluttering? Then you’ve probably got a crush! And what better way to lighten the mood and maybe even drop a hint than with some hilarious crush jokes and puns?

Prepare to unleash your inner comedian with our collection of side-splitting crush-related humor. We’ve compiled the punniest, wittiest, and cheesiest jokes guaranteed to make you (and maybe your crush!) smile.
Get ready to laugh your heart out and find the perfect joke to break the ice – or at least make your crush think you’re funny. Let the crushing (and the jokes) begin!
Best Crush Jokes and Puns: The Ultimate List to Make You Blush
- I have a crush on someone who sells maps. I think I’m lost in their eyes.
- My crush told me they like someone who’s good at math. Guess I’ll have to add them to my list of reasons to improve.
- Why did the orange stop running after its crush? It ran out of juice!
- I tried to impress my crush with a magic trick, but they weren’t impressed. Turns out, making myself disappear wasn’t the move.
- What do you call a crush that works at a bakery? A real cutie pie!
- My crush asked me if I liked raisins. I said, “I’m not sure, I haven’t graphed them yet.”
- I told my crush I was writing a book about them. They asked what it was called. I said, “Chapter One.”
- My crush is a librarian. I’m trying to check myself out.
- Having a crush is like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube. You’re constantly twisting and turning, but the pieces just won’t align.
- I saw my crush at the gym today. I think I pulled a muscle just trying to look nonchalant.
- My crush is a gardener. I guess you could say I’m really rooting for them.
- Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing (and my crush).
- My crush said they like someone spontaneous. So, I impulsively adopted a llama. Still waiting for the date.
- I told my crush I was good at parallel parking. It was a lie. Now I’m parallel stressed.
- My crush is into astronomy. I’m over here trying to planet a date.
Crush Jokes and Puns: The Perfect Icebreaker?
Nervous about approaching your crush? Crush jokes and puns might just be your secret weapon! A well-placed, lighthearted pun can break the ice and show off your playful side. Just be sure to keep it clean, relatable, and read the room! A little humor can go a long way in…
- Image Macro: A picture of a planet with heart-shaped rings, captioned: “I’ve got my orbit set on you.”
- Is your name WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a connection, and also struggling to find a password.
- If you were a parking ticket, I wouldn’t mind paying the fine.
- My crush is a chef: Guess I’m always going to be buttered up.
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged by my crush’s beauty!
- Are you a black hole? Because the closer I get to you, the more I see my life spiraling out of control.
- Image Macro: A stick figure trying to catch a star with a net, captioned: “Me trying to catch feelings for my crush.”
- I tried to serenade my crush with a kazoo. I think I scared them away.
- If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one. And if you were a parking ticket, I’d happily pay the fine.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… awkward and blushing, probably.
- My crush is a meteorologist: Guess I’m always under the weather with feelings.
- I told my crush I was a mind reader: She laughed and said, “Prove it!” I said, “You’re thinking about how awkward this is.”
- Are you a magnet? Because I’m irresistibly drawn to your… questionable fashion choices.
- Image Macro: A squirrel burying a giant acorn, captioned: “Me hiding my feelings for my crush so deep, even I can’t find them.”
- I tried to impress my crush with a magic trick, but all I did was make my self-esteem disappear.
Crush Puns: When Wordplay Meets Heartstrings
Crush puns: the ultimate flirting weapon! They’re more than just wordplay; they’re a playful way to express hidden feelings. These jokes, often corny and endearing, bridge the gap between admiration and humor. So, if you’re looking to break the ice or simply make your crush smile, a well-timed pun might…

- Is your name Earl Grey? Because you’re a hot tea.
- Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you and I can’t wait to see you again.
- Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for, and I want to learn more.
- If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber. I can’t help but smile around you.
- I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours? My heart is racing thinking about you.
- I know this is corny, but you’re a-maize-ing. I can’t stop thinking about how wonderful you are.
- Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes… and it’s a beautiful place to be.
- If you were a star, you’d be the sun. Everything revolves around you.
- You must be a magician, because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears. I have a crush on you.
- You must be a parking ticket, because you’ve got “fine” written all over you.
- Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more of your time.
- Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m really feeling a connection, and I can’t wait to see you again.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… on our first date.
- If you were a vegetable, you’d be a ‘cute-cumber’… and I’d want to eat you.
- I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours? I need to add you to my contacts.
Crush Jokes for Every Stage of Infatuation
Navigating the rollercoaster of a crush? “Crush Jokes for Every Stage of Infatuation” delivers the perfect comedic relief. From initial butterflies to hopeful daydreaming and even the sting of unrequited feelings, this collection offers relatable puns and jokes. It’s a lighthearted way to laugh at yourself (and maybe subtly hint…

- Is your name Ariel? Because we Mermaid for each other.
- I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours? I need to add you to my contacts.
- If you were a vegetable, you’d be a ‘cute-cumber’… and I’d want to eat you.
- Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you and I can’t wait to see you again.
- If you were a song, you’d be my favorite track on repeat.
- Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.
- I’m usually not this forward, but I’d be incomplete without you.
- Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see.
- If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one!
- You know, I always thought happiness started with an “H,” but it turns out it starts with “U.”
- You must be a magician, because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.
- Image Macro: A picture of a brain with a single thought bubble that says, “Her?”.
- You must be a parking ticket, because you’ve got “fine” written all over you and are a nuisance.
- Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m really feeling a connection, and I can’t wait to see you again.
- Image Macro: A picture of a person tripping over nothing with the caption: “Me trying to navigate my dating life.”
Unexpectedly Hilarious Crush Jokes: Guaranteed to Get a Laugh
Navigating the crush zone? Inject some humor! “Unexpectedly Hilarious Crush Jokes” offers a collection of puns and witty one-liners designed to break the ice and lighten the mood. Forget awkward silences; these jokes are guaranteed to get a laugh (and maybe even a blush!). From cheesy pick-up lines to relatable…

- My crush is like a well-written function: elegant, efficient, and I can’t stop calling it.
- Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for (and I’m about to stalk you).
- I tried to ask my crush out using a math equation, but I think I just proved I’m irrational.
- Image Macro: A dog wearing a tiny lab coat, looking at a beaker with the caption: “Trying to concoct the perfect pickup line.”
- My love life is like a broken pencil: pointless. But at least I can use it to scribble down my unrequited feelings.
- I’m not saying I’m obsessed, but my crush’s name is now my Wi-Fi password, and I have a Google Alert set for their name.
- If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one! (But I’d still be obtuse about expressing my feelings.)
- Relationship status: Currently accepting applications for someone to help me decode my crush’s mixed signals. Bonus points if you speak fluent sarcasm.
- I tried to flirt with my crush by quoting Shakespeare, but I forgot the words and just started making bird noises. I guess you could say my performance was for the birds.
- Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte. (And I spend way too much money there just to catch a glimpse of you.)
- Image Macro: A picture of a brain with a single thought bubble that says: “Should I text them? Should I play it cool? Should I move to Antarctica?”
- My crush is like a pop-up ad: I didn’t ask for them, but now they’re all I can focus on.
- Is your name Bluetooth? Because I’m really feeling a connection (but I’m also worried about the limited range).
- I accidentally sent my crush a text meant for my therapist: “I keep dreaming about them, but I’m too afraid to make a move.” Send help.
- If you were a parking ticket, you’d have “fine” written all over you. And I’d gladly pay the fine just to see you again.
Crush Jokes and Puns: Avoiding the Cringe Factor
Want to make your crush smile (without cringing them into oblivion)? Crush jokes and puns can be sweet icebreakers, but tread carefully! Avoid overly cheesy lines or anything that feels forced. Focus on clever wordplay related to their interests or shared experiences. A little self-deprecating humor can also disarm the…

- Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for, and I’m feeling lucky.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… awkwardly trying to figure out how to split the bill.
- Swipe right if you’re looking for someone who’s good at pretending to listen while silently judging your taste in music.
- I’m not usually this forward, but I’d be incomplete without you.
- Image Macro: A picture of a confused dog with the caption: “Wait, you mean you can’t read my mind and know I have a crush on you?”
- Do you like science? Because I lab you a lot.
- I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours? I think I’m experiencing a serious case of “love at first text.”
- Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears… along with my ability to form coherent sentences.
- If you were a vegetable, you’d be a ‘cute-cumber’… and I’d probably forget to water you.
- “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Olive.” “Olive who?” “Olive you!” Please go out with me.
- Image Macro: A picture of a brain with a single thought bubble that says: “What if they don’t like my Spotify playlist?”
- Is your name Autumn? Because I’m falling for you… and I’m about to trip over my own feet.
- If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… awkwardly posing for a photo booth.
- I tried to flirt with my crush by quoting Shakespeare, but I forgot the words and just started making bird noises. I guess you could say my performance was for the birds.
Crush-Related Puns: Are They Worth the Risk?
So, you’re thinking of dropping a pun on your crush? Risky move! A perfectly timed joke could be charming and break the ice. But a clunker? Ouch. Weigh the potential reward against the potential awkward silence. Are you feeling confident? Go for it! Just remember, humor is subjective, and a…

- I tried to write my crush a love letter using only song titles. It turned out to be a real mixed tape of emotions.
- Is your name Alexa? Because you listen to me, and I’m starting to think you’re spying on me.
- I went to the library to check out my crush, but they said I couldn’t take them home.
- Image Macro: A picture of a phone with a low battery, captioned: “My heart after seeing my crush with someone else.”
- I’m not saying I’m obsessed, but I’ve started leaving positive Yelp reviews for all the places my crush frequents.
- Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you, and I’m willing to take the hit.
- I tried to bake a cake for my crush, but I forgot the sugar. It was a bitter-sweet gesture.
- My therapist told me to face my fears, so I finally admitted to my crush that I can’t parallel park.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… filing for bankruptcy after I buy you everything you’ve ever wanted.
- Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for, and I’m ready to accept the terms and conditions.
- I tried to flirt with my crush using science puns, but all I got was reaction.
- Why did the atom cross the bar? It heard there was a good-looking molecule there.
- Are you a time traveler? Because I can see you in my future.
- Image Macro: A picture of a dog looking longingly at a mail carrier, captioned: “Waiting for my crush to text back.”
- I tried to write a haiku about my crush, but it was too hard to express the depth of my feelings in just three lines.
Romantic Crush Jokes: Setting the Mood Right
Crush jokes and puns are a fun, lighthearted way to express those fluttery feelings! They can be a perfect icebreaker, adding a dash of humor to a conversation. “Romantic Crush Jokes: Setting the Mood Right” explores how to use these jokes effectively, ensuring your playful advances come across as charming…

- Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for… and I’m not afraid to admit I’ve been lurking on your social media.
- If our love was a chemical reaction, you’d be the catalyst.
- Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you… and I’d love to take you anywhere.
- I’m no organ donor, but I’d be happy to give you my heart.
- If you were a sandwich at McDonald’s, you’d be a McHottie.
- Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte, and I’m hoping we could espresso our feelings for each other.
- Image Macro: A picture of a brain with a single thought bubble that says: “What if they think my puns are cheesy?”
- Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears… and I forget my own name.
- Is your name Waldo? Because someone like you is hard to find, and I’ve been looking for you everywhere.
- I may not be a photographer, but I can picture us together… awkwardly laughing at my terrible jokes.
- Is your name Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other and I’m hoping we can go swimming together.
- I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together… laughing at my terrible jokes.
- If you were a Transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine… and I’d transform my whole schedule to spend time with you.
- If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one… and I’d tell everyone about it.
- I know this is corny, but you’re a-maize-ing… and I’m hoping we can cultivate a beautiful relationship.
Crush Puns: From Subtle Hints to Bold Moves
Navigating the crush landscape can be tricky, but luckily, humor’s on our side! “Crush Jokes and Puns” explores the art of subtly (or not-so-subtly) expressing your affections. From innocent wordplay that drops a hint to bolder puns that declare your feelings, discover how to use witty banter to connect and…

- Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for, and I’m willing to share my location data.
- Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got ‘fine’ written all over you, and I’m prepared to pay the price.
- If you were a Transformer, you’d be Optimus Find.
- My heart does a little dance every time I see your face… and occasionally trips over its own feet.
- Is your name Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other.
- I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you.
- Relationship status: Currently accepting applications for a crush who appreciates my questionable taste in music and even more questionable dance moves.
- Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more of your time.
- I tried to flirt with my crush using science puns. It resulted in no reaction, they must be noble gases.
- If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
- If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
- Is your name Winter? Because I’m falling for you… and I’m about to trip over my own feet.
- Are you a star? Because every time I see you, the world just seems to light up.
- Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.
- My crush is a chef: I guess you could say I’m always buttered up.